Entry 74: Some Friendly

Date: March 30, 2008
Weight: 197 pounds
Song: Jimmy Cliff - Vietnam

There was a SWUMP friendly played today at McCleery, this one pitting Roggles vs. BigJ. And what a friendly it was! It was a back-and-forth battle with no one holding more than a 1-up lead the whole way, until Roggles made a picture-perfect par on #17 to close the match out 2&1. Fans of golf can only hope that they saved some of that magic for next Sunday's match (at Riverway?).

As for me - I'm dreading going to work tomorrow. I sometimes wish that I could quit my job - especially at a sleepless 11:30 pm on a Sunday night.

Today's song is a request from Kev. I always enjoy hearing requests for songs in genres other than what I usually listen to, because unlike most people who will claim "wide tastes", I can admit that my tastes are actually quite narrow and I like opening things up occasionally. I've been reading up on the Vietnam war lately, and it is amazing how dumb a war it really was. If you're ever advising a politician and sitting around wondering "Should we side with the nationalist freedom fighters or not the nationalist freedom fighters?" - I'd say go with the nationalists, you won't regret it.

Entry 73: Dealing With Demons

Date: March 29, 2008
Weight: 198 pounds
Song: Pearl Jam - Hail, Hail

I had another interesting round of golf with BigJ today. No one else joined us, perhaps because they were afraid of the expected poor weather as scaredy-cats often are. But like most cats, they were in the right as we suffered through cool damp conditions before being subjected to an insane pummelling of hail for the last 3 holes. I ended up losing a ball on 18 in the gathering whiteness, even though we saw it land just beside the fairway. If only I'd had a pink ball in the bag! The fact that BigJ played the last 3 holes in 1-under (with a near ace on #16) is quite impressive.

I managed a respectable 77, but I can't say that the round was demon free. We've taken to naming the demons that plague my game, and today's visitor is known as "Meklar", overlord of the short putt stab. He gifted both of us with his presence today, with my worst episode occurring on #11. After a respectable 37 on the front followed by a bogey on the difficult 10th, I stood over a 25-footer for birdie at only 2-over. A nice round going! The greens were tricky in spots where the grass was dead and on some hills the ball would just not stop rolling gently downhill. Despite the treachery, I cozied it down to only 4-feet. BigJ had 3-putted from a similarly tricky spot and I was keen to avoid the same fate. So as I stood over my putt, a whirlwind of negative swing thoughts came rolling through my open mind. "Don't decelerate! Get it to the hole!" - and that's when Meklar struck. I slowly took it back before following through with a quick jerk and struck the putt not once but twice, for a dreaded "two-hit" on only a 4-foot putt. This is now the third time I've done this while putting in 2008 (after never having done it before) and it is not the sign of a putting stroke in perfect working order. But despite this, the putt actually went in for a 5! This is actually impressive - to hole the shot on a double-hit. Don't try this at home.

With the demons in full swing, I was in deep trouble, making strange bogeys on #12 (chunking a chip) and #14 (hitting a 7-iron 50 yards offline). Then the hails came, washing the demons away.

Will the demons return next round? I don't know, but I intend to find out and fight on. The demons may have me on the run, but I do not intend to give up.

Entry 72: Tricked Into Golfing

Date: March 28, 2008
Weight: 197 pounds
Song: My Morning Jacket - The Way That He Sings

I got tricked into playing golf this afternoon. Although it was a working Friday, I received a message from Roggles that he was playing golf with BigJ's teacher group this afternoon. Given that I had his golf clubs in my car (which are actually my old clubs in Gned's old bag), I figured I had best show up and play myself. The game was scheduled for 3:04 which was awfully early for a Friday but I had been working like a cat all week so figured I could pull it off.

But no sooner had I decided to show my ugly rat-face, then Roggles cancelled claiming he hadn't realized that the teetime was 3pm. What message did you read exactly? Anyways with my decision already psychologically made, I had no choice but to ditch work at 2:45 and head out to McCleery to play with BigJ and Wongtanamo.

Despite the snow that peppered the ground earlier this morning, the round was played in reasonably warm dry conditions. My game has somehow totally improved and I posted a solid 74 at a tricky wet course. I think the key to recovering a golf game from the ashes of disaster has been to actually play and practice occasionally. Yes - I was quite impressive today, especially considering that I drank upwards of 8 beer during the round (and then a couple afterwards). There's nothing like the "Goddamn my job!" Friday atmosphere to really provoke a solid game it seems.

I think that this is going to be an excellent 2008 - even if I'm not going to get down to 190 as soon as I had hoped.

Entry 71: These Things I Believe

Date: March 27, 2008
Weight: 196 pounds
Song: Buzzcocks - I Believe

It's been cold lately and I don't like it. But this is merely a rearguard action from old man winter and should be given no credence. Summer is nearly upon us - and we should nay MUST embrace it.

I believe in springtime. The coming two weeks are the best two weeks of the year and no amount of work misery will dampen my spirits.

Entry 70: No Big Hair!

Date: March 26, 2008
Weight: 196 pounds
Song: Pavement - Cut Your Hair

I'm going to have to get a haircut soon.

Entry 69: A Good Friday

Date: March 21, 2008
Weight: 196 pounds
Song: The Undertones - Teenage Kicks

I had my first truly decent round of the year out at Fraserview today with a 4-birdie 74. BigJ and I managed to tie PW and Vlad in the beer & nachos match due to a couple of late mishaps from PW, who sadly bogeyed 17&18 to finish at even par. Vladdy was a particularly tough customer today as he carded 3 triples and still shot 86 (and BigJ was no slouch with a 77 - in fact the cabin now has him as a solid 7!).

Four golfers went out and four golfers broke net 70. That's pretty good.

Entry 68: The Audacity of Hope

Date: March 20, 2008
Weight: 196 pounds
Song: Mazzy Star - Five String Serenade

I've come around to realizing that Barack Obama is the real deal and will be a fine president. His recent poll numbers have slipped, but I can't see how he doesn't win in November. He's the obvious antidote to George Bush, which is what America needs in 2008. If you haven't watched his recent "A Perfect Union" speech where he discusses the whole Reverend Wright controversy, I suggest you do so - it's a wonderful speech and it's depressing to watch how he's getting dragged through the muck by the usual political hacks. I hate it when after someone gives a speech, the pundits immediately start wondering "How do you think the perception of what he has said will play?" rather than talking about what was actually said.

Can't anyone talk about issues and substance? Must it always be a meta-discussion about the politic machinations complete with posturing and retardation? The balance of the focus being on the horse race rather than the horse is a little lopsided.

But having watched those Reverend Wright clips, I'm not particularly surprised that those right wing "God Bless the U.S.A." superpatriots didn't like it. "God Damn America!" indeed. But why should we care what some fiery black reverend says to his flock? Are we really surprised that he might talk like that? I'm not. Should we pin everything that Rev. Wright says on Obama? I hope not.

The bottom line is that they should focus on selecting the best next president of the USA. And that man is Barack Obama.

Entry 67: Ukraine is Strong!

Date: March 19, 2008
Weight: 195 pounds
Song: New Order - Everything's Gone Green

We may not yet know who will win the 2008 SWUMP, but the best guess is Vladdy so this song is a fitting tribute. Enjoy yourself Vlad, you've earned the break.

I have a nice weekend of golf ahead and I'm looking forward to it (although not so much to the cool wet conditions). I'm heading out to the range and then playing 9 holes with Roggles tomorrow, so we'll see how his game is. He may be hard pressed to play to a 15 right off the bat, but I think we should recall how he beat me by 1 shot over 9 holes back in 1999 when we played in the Cook Islands with rented clubs (42-43). I'd like to see him claim that he was "practicing" a lot then...

Then I have a Riverway game Friday followed by some Uplands golf on Saturday/Sunday. Hopefully I'll be back on solid ground for my match with Old Tom Reg next week and am not reduced to a mere statistician and cheerleader for round two.

Entry 66: Working the Late Shift

Date: March 18, 2008
Weight: 195 pounds
Song: Cat Power - Cross Bones Style

I'm closely monitoring the build system tonight because I've switched the start time from 10pm to 2am to accommodate the India developers. It looks like it's all more or less working. Hooray!

Entry 65: Happy St. Patrick's Day

Date: March 17, 2008
Weight: 196 pounds
Song: Ash - Uncle Pat

A great 3-1 Canucks win tonight over the Coyotes. Luongo was great and the Sedins finally potted a couple. I'm not sure what's wrong with Bieksa as he's been looking terrible. I know he's been hurt so I'll cut him some slack... for now. How about that Daniel Carcillo character? He took a lot of stupid penalties, but you sure noticed him everytime he was on the ice. I wonder if he'll ever be able to play within control, because if he does he'll be something.

The Rhino spent the game talking to someone from Ireland. What are the odds of that?

I gave my dad a call after the second intermission which was greatly appreciated. We're playing golf over the Easter weekend at Uplands (my last chance to get in shape for the SWUMP). He informed me that neither my Uncle Pat nor Uncle Patrick will be able to make it, so it looks like we'll be playing with Darryl and Greg. Now there's nothing wrong with McCleery or Peace Portal, but I am looking forward to Uplands fairways with real grass. I might even be able to avoid chunking my chips.

Entry 64: Restless

Date: March 13, 2008
Weight: 199 pounds
Song: Lush - Light From a Dead Star

I just took a couple of "Nighttime" cold capsules so we'll see how this goes. Sleeping aids don't usually work very well on me, and sometimes I just feel foggier and dopier while I lay in bed restless. But we'll give it a shot tonight because I'm sick of being sick and want a proper night's sleep.

Entry 63: I Had a Tough Day

Date: March 12, 2008
Weight: 197 pounds
Song: The Unicorns - I Was Born a Unicorn

It was a tough day at work today and I fear that the builds are going to break tonight because of the code changes that I submitted.

Entry 62: What Must I Do?

Date: March 11, 2008
Weight: 198 pounds
Song: Erasure - A Little Respect

I'm not getting very much respect from the pundits in the 2008 SWUMP as I prepare for my match against BC Sports Hall-of-Famer Old Tom Reg. And don't think that the poor notices aren't being pinned to my bulletin board.

But I am a winner not a quitter and I will predict a tough match that will be a lot closer than all you naysayers insist. I may well be shaking Reg's hand at the end of the day, but I'll be doing it with my head held high.

And do not forget, dear readers, that I will be the only tournament participant with a major match play triumph in his closet.

Entry 61: Dealing With Humans

Date: March 10, 2008
Weight: 199 pounds
Song: The Cure - Just Like Heaven

Given the tangled and incestuous group of friends and friends of friends that I have, I occasionally observe a social interaction between a friend and their ex, or between a friend and their friends who are still friends with the ex, or between a friend and the friends of the ex, etc. Wow - it's very exciting! Whose side are you on? Remember that the first circle of hell is for the indecisive.

Yes, I have to admit that I really don't get it. In this world it does transpire that people date, then maybe they get married, or they move in together, or they break up, or they switch to an open relationship, or someone goes to jail or university, or they move overseas, etc. In the end it doesn't really matter as it's just humans doing human things.

Now I understand that people don't necessarily relish spending time with an ex after a painful breakup. This is fair enough and no one is required to seek out unpleasant encounters. God knows I like to avoid conflict!

But when you start excising your friends or avoiding doing normal things then you are taking it too far. Why can't people just be civil to their exes? If Obama can negotiate with Syria and Iran, then surely you can tolerate your friends being friends with your ex. I even heard a friend talking about his apprehension that an ex might get invited to a wedding with "his" friends. Oh grow up already. A wedding is about the people getting married and not about you (unless you're one of the two of course). Get over yourself.

It's a big world. There's room enough for everyone.

Entry 60: Are You a Troll or a Hoser?

Date: March 9, 2008
Weight: 198 pounds
Song: Lynyrd Sknyrd - Sweet Home Alabama

I played golf today with BigJ and Wonger, winning quite convincingly with a sweet 77, breaking my streak of unfortunate post-80 results, so I am well-pleased. But is the glass half-full or half-empty? This is the question to you dear reader - are you a troll or a hoser? To answer, just respond with which one of these statements best identifies with you when replying to my regaling of the details of my exciting round.

1) What? You had 5 birdies and only shot 77?
2) Wow! You had 2 triples and still shot 77?

If option 1, then you might be a troll. If option 2, then you might be a hoser.

In honour of Kyle and his preparations for reading "To Kill a Mockingbird", today's song is straight from the Southland. I recall seeing TKAM as a play at the Stanley Theatre some five years ago, and it was a great show and a most enjoyable evening. Atticus Finch richly deserves AFI's awarding him the position of the greatest film hero of all time (just above Indiana Jones and James Bond).

Entry 59: Stop all the clocks

Date: March 8, 2008
Weight: 200 pounds
Song: Wilco - I Am Trying to Break Your Heart

If you live in (most parts of) North America, do not forget to set your clocks forward tonight. Late afternoon golf! Summer approaches ever faster.

Entry 58: Do I dare to eat a peach?

Date: March 7, 2008
Weight: 198 pounds
Song: Blue Oyster Cult - Don't Fear the Reaper

Summer is approaching and I'm left with the question of whether I squeeze another season out of my ill-fitting wardrobe or do I go on a spending spree and get outfitted with this year's fashions - plus-sized fashions.

I think time has run out and I'm going to have to go with option #2. I'm tired of golfing in jeans.

Entry 57: Farewell to Nova Scotia

Date: March 6, 2008
Weight: 198 pounds
Song: Smashing Pumpkins - 1979

I wonder what life would have been like if our family had stayed in Nova Scotia and not moved to Victoria in 1979. I would have none of my current friends - but would that be a bad thing? I will say nothing bad about the lot of you, but perhaps I missed out on a far better lot of well-adjusted friends? Who can say.

Thinking back now it surprises me how easy the move was for me. I adjusted quickly and barely concerned myself about leaving what had been my only home. I guess that's not uncommon for a six-year-old and my siblings would have found it much rougher.

Most of my earliest and most vivid memories from the pre-1979 period are probably fake as I'm not really remembering what happened to me so much as I am remembering my family sitting around remembering. Things bleed together.

I can't really remember my pre-1979 life whereas post-1979 events are easily recalled. Apart from the obvious fact that got older it is true that my pre-1979 life has no frame of reference whereas everything subsequent was constantly reinforced by the fact that my parents still live in the same house on the same street and I still pretty much the same friends.

I was just reading through an old photo album and it is strange that I can easily still imagine myself looking like I did then. Has it all been a dream? Perhaps I am still six years old? Where's Who-Who then?

Entry 56: Passion

Date: March 5, 2008
Weight: 197 pounds
Song: Barenaked Ladies - If I Had a Million Dollars

Yesterday I went over to PW's house to watch the Canuck game, which was an important divisional match against the Avs. But what I had forgotten was that it was also the day of the Ohio and Texas primaries, and there was simply no way that Ana was going to tolerate not watching Obama. This was OK by me as the Canucks are stupidheads who are probably going to miss the playoffs anyways.

Obama didn't have a particularly good day and lost to Hillary in both Ohio and Texas (though the net change in delegates wasn't too significant and he will still be able to romp to victory), but what was far more interesting was watching Ana watch Obama.

Ana is well into the throes of Obamamania and it was refreshing and interesting to observe someone who actually has passion for something. I've been somnambulent and cynical about everything for a while with my world-weary shrugs and a lack of ambition and emotion, so it was nice to watch someone who actually cares about things watch someone else who will probably actually change things.

Anyways, while we were watching snippets of the sorry Canuck game during the CNN timeouts, we managed to catch some Canadian channel announce the "Millionaire For Life" winner of $17 million. They announced it as an "Angela Towlee" from Burnaby - but I could read the cheque and it clearly said "Angela Towle". This was an interesting name from our past as the Towles were our dear friends and neighbours in Dartmouth: David was my age, while Angela was Jenny's age and was very close to both my sisters. I haven't spoken to any of them since we left Nova Scotia almost 29 years ago (when I was 6) so had no idea what they were up to (I had no idea that Angela had moved to BC 12 years ago, for example).

Well, my sisters confirmed today that Angela was indeed the winner. Wow. This is totally magical! I don't know what to say, but I will never ever mock anyone who buys a lottery ticket for anything ever again. Certainly I wish Angela all the best and hope that she does well with her dog breeding business (and I hope she manages to save her money!).

So I decided to ride the Dartmouth Hotstreak and bought a 6-49 ticket for tonight's draw. Could lightning strike twice? Nah - I failed miserably. I guess I will be showing my face at the salt mines tomorrow after all.

Entry 55: Remembering Rubik

Date: March 4, 2008
Weight: 197 pounds
Song: Led Zeppelin - Bron-Yr-Aur

Back in the early nineties, when I would regularly eat hot dogs at the UVic cafeteria with The Seahawk and Gned, I listened to naught but Classic Rock, and one of those bands was Led Zeppelin.

One summer which I strongly suspect was 1991, Gned showed us all how to solve the Rubik's Cube through a clever method which his friend Simon had shown him. First you made it into a series of Xs, and then you would sort the rest out by applying a series of memorized move combinations that filled them in one by one. For those who have never solved the cube and might think of it as some great intellectual achievement, I have to confess that it wasn't particularly hard.

One of the things I did was to play a song on my brother's stereo (as his room was the site of most social gatherings) and try to finish the cube off before the song ended. The above obscure Led Zeppelin instrumental from Physical Graffiti was a favourite of mine because it clocked it at only 2:06. I recall that I could regularly do it in about 1:30-1:45 so this one was always a better challenge than Night Flight.

Now 17 odd years later, I am somewhat bemused by this. For in the years since I have on occasion grabbed a cube from a friend's shelf only to find that I couldn't do much with it because I had never really attacked the cube from "first principles" or "using my intelligence" and had simply applied memorized instructions to handling specific situations. And once these solutions were lost (as no one ever wrote them down), all was lost. I am not certain but I think that the equally adept Gned ended up in this same boat.

Now, though I sometimes wish that I had written down that arcane knowledge so that I could plop on the Hendrix and try to recreate those bygone university days, I know in my heart that such things are gone and will never happen again.

Entry 54: One, Two, ...

Date: March 3, 2008
Weight: 198 pounds
Song: Pink Floyd - Free Four

I've lost the difficult first 2 pounds in only 54 days, so it's now on to the last 28.

Given that I'm going to be frequently golfing and not eating too many french fries, we may yet get this done. But The Seahawk probably put it best when I was whining about how tough it was to get back in shape. "So what's your workout regimen then?" Ummm.. maybe that is the problem.

No more joking around. Workouts begin next week.

Entry 53: The Long Con

Date: March 2, 2008
Weight: 199 pounds
Song: The Who - Won't Get Fooled Again

My devilish plan of playing poorly at every golf game of 2008 in an effort to take my BCGA handicap to comical heights is about to achieve its desired effect, as I have lulled the field of the upcoming Skulled Wedge Match Play into a false sense of security.

They do not appreciate that every two-chip, every yipped putt, every late round collapse, and every drive blapped rightwards into the adjacent farmer's field is part of an elaborate long con to get them to accept that my handicap is as high as I claim. It is quite an achievement for the 2004 Uplands Club Champion and 2005 Kootenay Loop Champion to claim a handicap of 6 or 7 and have the crowds say "Surely he meant to write 8". Yes!! Today's 90 was but one small step of the journey, that familiar journey of a thousand steps which culminates in a trophy presentation, a feeling that I, unlike you dear reader, know well.

But feel no shame in being so fooled, for you will not be alone, as none see my upcoming SWUMP victory coming.

Entry 52: Snowy vs. Parties

Date: March 1, 2008
Weight: 199 pounds
Song: The Smiths - Half a Person

I've never been much of a success at parties. I tend to be overly shy and to not talk much to people I don't know. This also leads to the people I do know becoming tired of the fact that I'm always talking to them. And then there's the people that I have seen off and on for several years and "should know" - but don't remember their name or who they are. I do make an effort on occasion, but it consumes a lot of energy (which is never particularly ample) and sometimes I just don't bother trying.

I can't tell you how many times that I'm sitting enjoying myself at a party and someone walks over and says "Are you OK?" because I look unhappy. Generally it's just because I have issues with noise and bustle and just find parties not really my thing, and then I have this overwhelming desire to flee. But I don't flee. I just walk around looking like I'm going to flee which makes people think I'ms trange. I'm working on my issues but things are still in progress.

But my social calendar has not seen this sort of action in many years as I follow RP's Leap Party from last night with V's engagement party later on today. It should be entertaining.

But that is for later. This afternoon I am going to sneak in some golf. Golf courses are quiet contemplative places so long as you can avoid getting hit by your partner's shanks. I like golf. Summer is here!